what you are right now, is your lifetime’s work! was this what you wanted?

one would always think of oneself as good, but the truth is what others think of you. i am sure even a convict would have his reason for the crime but that doesn’t make him nice to you right ? it’s our impression about the person that matters to us. and so would be the impression about us what others carry in their mind!
whatever we are today is the culmination of all our acts, learning, dealings, conversations, friendships, enemity, research, observations, acquired skills, acquired habits, belief, hope – you name it – it played a part in making you what you are. the bigger question would be - is this what i wanted me to be? i am sure there is no saints among us (atleast in my friends circle) – but that doesn’t mean any of them is a lesser human being.
i shout at a person who cuts me off the road and probably if not in a good mood, i will try that on him back – is that what i am? a nuisance to fellow drivers?
i might frown and curse a person at the hotel for not bringing the right order or even an order in time – is that what i am ? a person who thinks that he is superhuman? or even the master to everyone around?
i might have a few drinks than usual on certain days and sleep off on the couch. – am i a drunkard who doesn’t care ?
i might not find time to serve my religious duties – religiously time to time – am i an atheist?
i might have as a part of my job, sold a product which was not so great or the customer – am I a cheat?
situations like these doesn’t really mean that you are branded to be a nuisance, drunkard, atheist, cheat etc etc. but think of real life scenarios where you form an opinion among the crowd that you interact with on a daily or periodical basis – your colleagues at office, your helping hand at home, the security guard at your home or workplace, the bearer at your favorite restaurant.
am i an un-approachable ass at work or do everyone run to me at times of trouble or doubts?
does the security guard bite his teeth while smiling back at you?
does your maid talk behind your back (or may be even show you a finger )?
does the bearer at that restaurant reserve the best seat for you the moment you pass the door?
you don’t need to be a rocket scientist to say that a good signal from anyone around you is a reflection of what you are and vice versa. if you get a wrong signal from any levels in the society, probably it’s time to check whether you are on the right path. after all, it’s our lifetimes achievement – what we are now, so it better be nice!

first impressions need not be the last one

what if you are questioned for each and every thing for two years of your professional life? would that mean that your boss is bad? i thought so, until recently. my reporting authority at an ex company had this habit of questioning each and every thing that i did – be it good or bad. i remember those days weren’t so easy. my interactions with him were also tainted with my prejudgment which made things even worse. he used to (i thought) purposely put me on continuous market visits which made my social life a miserable one. i had to make close to 23 days of extensive travel(in a month) within the state of tamil nadu – mostly the southern part and i thought of it as a deliberate way to punish me with his authority.
i would still believe that one day things would change – but my marriage meant that i couldn’t take such extended trip and so, had to join a job with lesser travel.
when i looked back, i always thought that this episode was an open one in my mind and that the disconnect that i had with my ex boss needs to be sorted out, as after all he was doing his job. got an opportunity later 3 years hence to meet him – and as usual, i never made him feel that i had any of the bad memories of the job. this slowly grew into a friendship among the two of us and we called each other and metup occasionally whenever he came to my town or me to his.
i realize now, that he has given much importance to my friendship than i ever thought he did. he called me recently to just let me know that he had changed the job and the number. then again today he calls me first thing in the morning to tell that he has decided to leave the ‘jobs’ and join an ngo for a social cause and not for money. this only proves that the title is correct!
also, each time we shut a person because of something that he had done to us which we disliked, we effectively shut the whole relationship that it may have developed into in the course of years. i am sure it was not for any benefit that i was in touch with him and vice versa. simple things in life like friendship and sharing among anyone you meet in life will develop into something really special at some point of time – and that’s when you realize that it was worth every second you spent on that relationship. after all, happiness and peace cannot be bought from any store!
if i had this realization at that point in time, i could have looked at the journeys as a company paid way to explore the whole of a state (we used to have a lot of free time while we travel). i could have picked up a dslr and probably even written and amateur travel diary of tn… see the things you lose !

the green chilly

this is the red hot green chilly which is a kerala speciality.

lychee

from my private garden back home. this is a great fruit. please dont compare the same with rumputan which is a less fleshy and more sour version of this fruit. the title is linked to wikipedia if the fruit should interest you...